Just finished "The Last Lecture", a book about a college professor who contracted pancreatic cancer, Prof Randy Pausch. He has only a few months to live and a few months back he delivered a lecture, the last lecture about "fulfilling your childhood dreams". in the book, the lecture script was condensed and he also included in it anecdotes on how he was spending his last days, as well as some of the highlights in his life. but mostly, he was dishing out advice on how to live life to the fullest and also, hoping to, in the process, leave something behind for his kids.
it's really inspirational, and not quite Tuesdays-with-Morrie-esque, it's less morbid and more realistic. he focuses on the good times in life, how he managed to live out his childhood dreams. For example, he wanted to be a Disney Imagineer, the people who come up with new theme park rides for Disney World. He also wanted to be asked to contribute an article to the World Book Encyclopedia. He's also very honest, saying how much it pains him that his children will be growing up without a father and how his wife is having a really hard time, having to take care of three small kids (7, 5 years and 18months) and a dying husband, whilst keeping her husband's illness from the kids.
in it, he talks about simple things that people should do in life, but don't. in fact, such advice can only be dispensed by a dying man, who has nothing to look forward to, so he looks back, and reflects on mistakes and good things that he did that got him to where he was. i just saw youtube, and found out that he died today. it's really sad. like really. cause he was just so inspirational in the book.
one of my favourite quotes in the book is "the brick walls are there to find out how badly you want something, they're there to keep the other people out". it really does put things into perspective, and i think i will try hard to remember it. this was a man who faced the ultimate brick wall, death. obviously he couldn't tear it down, but he sure didn't let it get in the way. how many of us, upon knowing we've contracted some kind of terminal ailment, would continue living a life with such fulfillment, touching so many others in the process. for those unacquainted with him, do catch his lecture on youtube or read his book. i guarantee you'll be touched.
anyway, back to the quote. it got me thinking about the brick walls in my own life. what's there that's preventing me from getting something i want really badly. Good grades, of course. Flying colours. and the brick wall? Prelims and A Levels. how badly do i want it? i really don't know. all my life i've been striving to score my As and it seems like it's finally come down to this. but the motivation is, rather unfortunately, lacking. perhaps it's only july. but that's a lie. there ain't that much time left. it got me thinking, just how badly do i want to do well for As? do i want to make it all the way, only to falter at the last step? it's too painful a thought to contemplate. i admit, i do love to see the As on my report slip, who doesn't? but it's not an overriding priority. growing up, i've realised that there's so much more to life that studying and scoring. of course, it opens doors and enables you to achieve so many more things. but at the end of the day, doing well academically, getting a scholarship and studying in a top university, getting a cushy career, are merely means to an end. they are not an end in itself.
so what makes life meaningful? what is that end we are searching for? As a Christian, God certainly makes living more purposeful. and i am convinced that it is near impossible to find purpose in anything else. perhaps, community service, helping orphans? but how many people are capable of doing that selflessly and faithfully? a good job? high-flying career, world traveller?
anyhoos, grad night registration is next week. i can't believe how fast two years fly by. i do imagine i will leave RJ with a tinge of regret that i didn't achieve as much as i could have, or contributed as much as i would have liked. i do remember vividly the first day of school. soon, another milestone will be passed, and A Levels will end up a distant memory. Who was it who said that life was a journey, not a destination? how true that is.
One night I dreamed of walking along the shores of different lands. I could tell that You were with me by the footprints in the sand. As I gazed upon the heavens, I saw pages of my life. It was then I realized that You remained there by my side. When the clouds began to gather and the rains came falling down, I looked to only find one set of footprints on the ground. I said, "Lord, why did You leave me in the troubled times of life? I believed that You would always walk beside me day and night." (Then I heard:) "My precious child, I'd never leave you. I have carved you on the hollow of My hand. It's then I carried you in My arms, When you see one set of footprints in the sand" Dear Lord, will You be with me as I travel through the years? Will You be there in the struggles? Will You wipe away the tears? As my eyes turn toward the ocean and the shores of distant lands, I'm still thinking of the single set of footprints in the sand. (I heard Him say:) "My precious child, I'd never leave you. I have carved you on the hollow of My hand. It's then I carried you in My arms, When you see one set of footprints in the sand." Will I hear the angels singing, as my life comes to an end. Oh Lord, I long to see You. Will You be there once again? My eyes turn toward the heavens, along the path of foreign lands, Once more, I'm thinking of the set of footprints in the sand. (Jesus said:) "My precious child, I'd never leave you. See your name carved on the hollow of My hand. I'm here to carry you to your home. You will see one set of footprints in the sand.
Wild Swans - Jung Chang
The Life You Always Wanted - John Ortberg
21: How Six Students Took Vegas For Millions - Ben Mezrich
John 3:16 - Max Lucado
Geopolitics: A Very Short Introduction - Klaus Dodds
The New Asian Hemisphere: The Irresistible Shift of Global Power to the East - Kishore Mahbubhani
Malaysian Politicians Say the Darndest Things, Vol. 1 - Amir Muhammad
The Post-American World - Fareed Zakaria
Life on the Edge - James Dobson
The Case For Christ - Lee Strobel
International Relations: A Very Short Introduction - Don Wilkinson
Just Like Jesus - Max Lucado
Fireseeds from Korea to the World - Nils Witmer Becker
Prayer: the Key to Revival - Dr. Yonggi Cho
If You Want to Walk On Water, Get Out Of the Boat - John Ortberg
In The Grip of Grace - Max Lucado
The Shape of The World To Come - Laurent Cohen-Tanugi
